ज़िंदगी में रिश्तें होना जरुरी है

ज़िंदगी में रिश्तें होना जरुरी है,
लेकिन मेरे दोस्त इन रिश्तों मे ज़िंदगी होना ज्यादा जरुरी है..

जीन रिश्तों मे नही जान उन रिश्तों का नही कोई मान..
ऐसे रिश्तों पे हम अकसर करते है झुठा अभीमान..

जीन रिश्तों मे नही जान- मान- सन्मान, ऐसे रिश्तों का हम क्यों करते है झूठा गुणगान?

ऐसे भ्रमित दिखावों मे हमारे खो जाने का चान्स "मैक्स" है,
क्योंकि ऐसे रिश्तें तो हमारी भावनावों पे चार्ज किया व्यर्थ का "टैक्स" है...

(This is copyrighted and has been published in various magzines by the name of the blogger)

Letter to CM Shri Devendra Fadnavis

To
Shri  Devendraji Fadnavis
Honorable Chief Minister
Maharashtra.

Sir,

Warm Regards. I am Amit Girdhar Heda from Nagpur. Firstly let me congratulate you for the bold and visionary decision taken by the government, under your leadership regarding the strict implementation & mandatory use of helmet. Besides preventing the fatalities resulting from head injuries, various skin and hair related problems are also reduced to a large extent by the regular use of helmet. As you are known to have a great public image as a proactive, scholarly leader with integrity and intelligence i am sure people will eventually realise that this decision is, in fact, a blessing in disguise for them.

                Sir, to ensure the smooth implementation of this decision kindly permit me to give a suggestion. Recently the government made LED bulbs available at subsidized rates to promote its usage as a measure to save electricity. To the best of my knowledge the above scheme has evoked encouraging response. Sir, is it possible to adopt and promote similar scheme for helmets? This will help to curb the malpractices indulged by the traders who exploit the general public and the public too will be motivated to buy and use without grudge. Sir, I am totally a non political person and my sole interest in writing to you is my belief that we, as citizens have responsibility towards social governance especially when we have a competent leader like yourself leading from the forefront.

Regards,
Amit Heda.

(This was written & sent on 18th Feb 2016)

नवरात्रि क्या है??? और नवरात्र का वैज्ञानिक और आध्यात्मिक रहस्य.......

नवरात्र शब्द से नव अहोरात्रों (विशेष रात्रियां) का बोध होता है। इस समय शक्ति के नव रूपों की उपासना की जाती है। 'रात्रि' शब्द सिद्धि का प्रतीक है।

भारत के प्राचीन ऋषियों-मुनियों ने रात्रि को दिन की अपेक्षा अधिक महत्व दिया है, इसलिए दीपावली, होलिका, शिवरात्रि और नवरात्र आदि उत्सवों को रात में ही मनाने की परंपरा है। यदि रात्रि का कोई विशेष रहस्य न होता,... तो ऐसे उत्सवों को रात्रि न कह कर दिन ही कहा जाता। लेकिन नवरात्र के दिन, नवदिन नहीं कहे जाते।

मनीषियों ने वर्ष में दो बार नवरात्रों का विधान बनाया है। विक्रम संवत के पहले दिन अर्थात चैत्र मास शुक्ल पक्ष की प्रतिपदा (पहली तिथि) से नौ दिन अर्थात नवमी तक। और इसी प्रकार ठीक छह मास बाद आश्विन मास शुक्ल पक्ष की प्रतिपदा से महानवमी अर्थात विजयादशमी के एक दिन पूर्व तक। परंतु सिद्धि और साधना की दृष्टि से शारदीय नवरात्रों को ज्यादा महत्वपूर्ण माना गया है।इन नवरात्रों में लोग अपनी आध्यात्मिक और मानसिक शक्ति संचय करने के लिए अनेक प्रकार के व्रत, संयम, नियम, यज्ञ, भजन, पूजन, योग साधना आदि करते हैं। कुछ साधक इन रात्रियों में पूरी रात पद्मासन या सिद्धासन में बैठकर आंतरिक त्राटक या बीज मंत्रों के जाप द्वारा विशेष सिद्धियां प्राप्त करने का प्रयास करते हैं।

नवरात्रों में शक्ति के 51 पीठों पर भक्तों का समुदाय बड़े उत्साह से शक्ति की उपासना के लिए एकत्रित होता है। जो उपासक इन शक्ति पीठों पर नहीं पहुंच पाते, वे अपने निवास स्थल पर ही शक्ति का आह्वान करते हैं।

आजकल अधिकांश उपासक शक्ति पूजा रात्रि में नहीं, पुरोहित को दिन में ही बुलाकर संपन्न करा देते हैं। सामान्य भक्त ही नहीं, पंडित और साधु-महात्मा भी अब नवरात्रों में पूरी रात जागना नहीं चाहते। न कोई आलस्य को त्यागना चाहता है। बहुत कम उपासक आलस्य को त्याग कर आत्मशक्ति, मानसिक शक्ति और यौगिक शक्ति की प्राप्ति के लिए रात्रि के समय का उपयोग करते देखे जाते हैं।मनीषियों ने रात्रि के महत्व को अत्यंत सूक्ष्मता के साथ वैज्ञानिक परिप्रेक्ष्य में समझने और समझाने का प्रयत्न किया। रात्रि में प्रकृति के बहुत सारे अवरोध खत्म हो जाते हैं। आधुनिक विज्ञान भी इस बात से सहमत है। हमारे ऋषि - मुनि आज से कितने ही हजारों वर्ष पूर्व ही प्रकृति के इन वैज्ञानिक रहस्यों को जान चुके थे।

दिन में आवाज दी जाए तो वह दूर तक नहीं जाएगी , किंतु रात्रि को आवाज दी जाए तो वह बहुत दूर तक जाती है। इसके पीछे दिन के कोलाहल के अलावा एक वैज्ञानिक तथ्य यह भी है कि दिन में सूर्य की किरणें आवाज की तरंगों और रेडियो तरंगों को आगे बढ़ने से रोक देती हैं। रेडियो इस बात का जीता - जागता उदाहरण है। कम शक्ति के रेडियो स्टेशनों को दिन में पकड़ना अर्थात सुनना मुश्किल होता है , जबकि सूर्यास्त के बाद छोटे से छोटा रेडियो स्टेशन भी आसानी से सुना जा सकता है।

वैज्ञानिक सिद्धांत यह है कि सूर्य की किरणें दिन के समय रेडियो तरंगों को जिस प्रकार रोकती हैं , उसी प्रकार मंत्र जाप की विचार तरंगों में भी दिन के समय रुकावट पड़ती है। इसीलिए ऋषि - मुनियों ने रात्रि का महत्व दिन की अपेक्षा बहुत अधिक बताया है। मंदिरों में घंटे और शंख की आवाज के कंपन से दूर - दूर तक वातावरण कीटाणुओं से रहित हो जाता है। यह रात्रि का वैज्ञानिक रहस्य है। जो इस वैज्ञानिक तथ्य को ध्यान में रखते हुए रात्रियों में संकल्प और उच्च अवधारणा के साथ अपने शक्तिशाली विचार तरंगों को वायुमंडल में भेजते हैं , उनकी कार्यसिद्धि अर्थात मनोकामना सिद्धि , उनके शुभ संकल्प के अनुसार उचित समय और ठीक विधि के अनुसार करने पर अवश्य होती है।

नवरात्र या नवरात्रि:

संस्कृत व्याकरण के अनुसार नवरात्रि कहना त्रुटिपूर्ण हैं। नौ रात्रियों का समाहार, समूह होने के कारण से द्वन्द समास होने के कारण यह शब्द पुलिंग रूप 'नवरात्र' में ही शुध्द है।

नवरात्र क्या है?

पृथ्वी द्वारा सूर्य की परिक्रमा के काल में एक साल की चार संधियाँ हैं। उनमें मार्च व सितंबर माह में पड़ने वाली गोल संधियों में साल के दो मुख्य नवरात्र पड़ते हैं। इस समय रोगाणु आक्रमण की सर्वाधिक संभावना होती है। ऋतु संधियों में अक्सर शारीरिक बीमारियाँ बढ़ती हैं, अत: उस समय स्वस्थ रहने के लिए, शरीर को शुध्द रखने के लिए और तनमन को निर्मल और पूर्णत: स्वस्थ रखने के लिए की जाने वाली प्रक्रिया का नाम 'नवरात्र' है।

नौ दिन या रात?

अमावस्या की रात से अष्टमी तक या पड़वा से नवमी की दोपहर तक व्रत नियम चलने से नौ रात यानी 'नवरात्र' नाम सार्थक है। यहाँ रात गिनते हैं, इसलिए नवरात्र यानि नौ रातों का समूह कहा जाता है।रूपक के द्वारा हमारे शरीर को नौ मुख्य द्वारों वाला कहा गया है। इसके भीतर निवास करने वाली जीवनी शक्ति का नाम ही दुर्गा देवी है। इन मुख्य इन्द्रियों के अनुशासन, स्वच्छ्ता, तारतम्य स्थापित करने के प्रतीक रूप में, शरीर तंत्र को पूरे साल के लिए सुचारू रूप से क्रियाशील रखने के लिए नौ द्वारों की शुध्दि का पर्व नौ दिन मनाया जाता है। इनको व्यक्तिगत रूप से महत्व देने के लिए नौ दिन नौ दुर्गाओं के लिए कहे जाते हैं।

शरीर को सुचारू रखने के लिए विरेचन, सफाई या शुध्दि प्रतिदिन तो हम करते ही हैं किन्तु अंग-प्रत्यंगों की पूरी तरह से भीतरी सफाई करने के लिए हर छ: माह के अंतर से सफाई अभियान चलाया जाता है। सात्विक आहार के व्रत का पालन करने से शरीर की शुध्दि, साफ सुथरे शरीर में शुध्द बुद्धि, उत्तम विचारों से ही उत्तम कर्म, कर्मों से सच्चरित्रता और क्रमश: मन शुध्द होता है। स्वच्छ मन मंदिर में ही तो ईश्वर की शक्ति का स्थायी निवास होता है।
नौ देवियाँ / नव देवी

नौ दिन यानि हिन्दी माह चैत्र और आश्विन के शुक्ल पक्ष की पड़वा यानि पहली तिथि से नौवी तिथि तक प्रत्येक दिन की एक देवी मतलब नौ द्वार वाले दुर्ग के भीतर रहने वाली जीवनी शक्ति रूपी दुर्गा के नौ रूप हैं-

1. शैलपुत्री
2. ब्रह्मचारिणी
3. चंद्रघंटा
4. कूष्माण्डा
5. स्कन्दमाता
6. कात्यायनी
7. कालरात्रि
8. महागौरी
9. सिध्दीदात्री

इनका नौ जड़ी बूटी या ख़ास व्रत की चीजों से भी सम्बंध है, जिन्हे नवरात्र के व्रत में प्रयोग किया जाता है-

1. कुट्टू (शैलान्न)
2. दूध-दही,
3. चौलाई (चंद्रघंटा)
4. पेठा (कूष्माण्डा)
5. श्यामक चावल (स्कन्दमाता)
6. हरी तरकारी (कात्यायनी)
7. काली मिर्च व तुलसी (कालरात्रि)
8. साबूदाना (महागौरी)
9. आंवला(सिध्दीदात्री)

क्रमश: ये नौ प्राकृतिक व्रत खाद्य पदार्थ हैं।

अष्टमी या नवमी?

यह कुल परम्परा के अनुसार तय किया जाता है। भविष्योत्तर पुराण में और देवी भावगत के अनुसार, बेटों वाले परिवार में या पुत्र की चाहना वाले परिवार वालों को नवमी में व्रत खोलना चाहिए। वैसे अष्टमी, नवमी और दशहरे के चार दिन बाद की चौदस, इन तीनों की महत्ता 'दुर्गासप्तशती' में कही गई है।

The blog writer/compiler is a management professional and operates a Manpower & Property Consultancy Firm. Besides, he is President of "Consumer Justice Council", Secretary of "SARATHI", Member of "Jan Manch", Non Official member of "Weights & Measurements Department", Nagpur, Holds "Palakatva of NMC" in Shivaji Nagar area and Is a Para Legal Volunteer, District Court Nagpur.

Keys for Effective Oral Presentation

There is a myth that great speakers are born, not made. This is based on the misconception that somehow certain individuals have the innate ability to stand in front of an audience with no anxiety and give a moving, dynamic speech. The truth is, however, that great speakers generally spend years developing and practicing their art of communication. All great speakers had to learn the basics of organisation, preparation, delivery and dealing with anxiety. In order to do anything well, it takes constant practice and a mastery of the basics. Speaking is no different.

Effective Oral Presentation Skills:

One of the most important presentation techniques you can apply to become a more confident and effective speaker is to reduce anxiety. People vary in their ability to speak confidently in public, but everyone gets nervous and everyone can learn how to improve their presentation skills by applying a few simple techniques. The main points to pay attention to in delivery are the quality of your voice, your rapport with the audience, use of notes and use of visual aids. Voice quality involves attention to volume, speed and fluency, clarity and pronunciation. Avoid filling pauses with "umm", "like" and "you know". Humor can be very effective, but do not tell a joke that might offend someone. The quality of your voice in a presentation will improve dramatically if you are able to practice beforehand in a room similar to the one you will be presenting in. Be sure to speak clearly and distinctly.

As a general rule, expect to cover much less content than you would in a written report. A presentation can easily be ruined if the content is too difficult for the audience to follow or if the structure is too complicated. Make difficult points easier to understand by preparing the listener for them, using plenty of examples and going back over them later. Leave time for questions within the presentation. Give your presentation a simple and logical structure. Include an introduction in which you outline the points you intend to cover and a conclusion in which you go over the main points of your talk. Convince your audience that they have something to gain from listening to you.

Following tips could help reduce your anxiety before your next presentation:

Be prepared: KNOW your subject!!

Prepare and rehearse your talk so that you speak with confidence. Practice, Practice, Practice. Standing up and speaking in private has many benefits. You can hear where you need to work on better wording, you can tell if you are going to be too long, you can see if some of your slides need improving, and you achieve a smoother talk.

Practice your presentation until you feel comfortable. Make sure you can present your information within whatever time limits you will have. Plan the space where you will give your presentation. Set up your equipment beforehand, and arrange chairs if necessary.

Know your audience: What is the purpose of your talk? To inform, persuade, entertain? Some basic questions to ask about an audience are:

Who will I be speaking to?

What do they know about my topic already?

What will they want to know about my topic?

What do I want them to know by the end of my talk?

By basing the content and style of your presentation on your answers to these questions, you can make sure that you are in tune with your audience. What you want to say about your topic may be much less important than what your audience wants to hear about it. Adapt your information to suit both purpose and audience.

Be positive: It’s normal to feel nervous about speaking in front of a group. Stand up straight, but avoid being stiff. Do not shift your weight from side to side. Don’t fold your arms or put hands in pockets; hold a book or pen instead.  Make it clear that you are knowledgeable and enthusiastic about your subject. Smile and be enthusiastic. If you look bored, why shouldn’t your audience be bored too?

Don't just read: Talk to your audience. Use your notes as prompts as needed. Show your audience a diagram or slide with a brief outline of your main points.

Provide examples: Try to make your presentation as concrete and   "down to earth" as possible. Add appropriate anecdotes and humor to drive home a point. Your audience will remember your message if you:
tell a personal story that’s relevant
add a touch of humour
give some surprising statistics
give them interesting things to look at.

Involve them in your talk: Invite them to answer questions.

Use visual aids: Supplement what you say with visual aids such as charts, transparencies, and slides. Make sure that everyone can easily see the visual aids. Don't use visual aids that are so complex that the audience will spend its time trying to read them instead of listening to you. Visual aids are supplements to what you say, not replacements for what you say.

Maintain eye contact: Shift your eye contact around the room so that everyone feels that you are talking to them.

Actively involve your audience: Your presentation is an amalgamation of your communication skills that uses all senses (primarily vision and hearing) and wit to gain attention. Keeping the attention of your audience is not done by content alone! People can only listen so long without their attention wandering. Making your presentation interesting will help you to capture and keep your audience's attention for a while, but you must do more. Build in some simple and quick activities for your audience so that they are actively involved in your presentation. Ask questions that you are confident your audience will be able to answer. Your audience will pay more attention if you occasionally move to another position, or come closer to them to make an important point.  Greet the audience and announce your topic. At the end, thank them for listening.

Use your voice effectively. Vary the tone of your voice and be careful not to talk too quickly. Stop to breathe!

End on a high note. Leave your audience feeling upbeat about what they have just heard.

At the conclusion of a presentation, there is generally a question and answer session that should be prepared for in advance. To prepare for this last hurdle, you should anticipate the questions that you could potentially be asked ahead of time. The more you prepare your answers the better well versed and confident you will be.

One tip you might employ during the question and answer session is to repeat the question being asked. This will give you some additional time to prepare your response. If you don’t know the answer to the question you are being asked, be honest and say that you don’t know but that you will find out. Remember to really listen to the questions, do not interrupt and make sure that you stay focused on the individual asking the question.

One final suggestion: RELAX! Some nervousness is not only expected, it is a force for productivity. Think about how far you have come and that you have something to say that no one else in the room knows. Exert your knowledge & ability with confidence.

“Making a good oral presentation is an art that involves attention to the needs of your audience, careful planning, using appropriate methods and means and attention to delivery.”

From: Amit Girdhar Heda,
Nagpur. M- 7588630891.

(The writer is a Faculty in Management and runs a Job Placement and Training Firm and much of what is published is based on his personal experiences as well as the references he has drawn from various material available.)

Feelings: Friends or Foe

  
Emotions are part of the richness of life. They add color and texture to the events of our lives. Our celebrations would be flat and tasteless without the bubbles of joy exuding from our soul. Grief and sadness are important companions as we wrestle with the meaning of loss. Pain warns us of danger. Anger stimulates us to action when we have been wronged. Love soothes our wounds and motivates us to break out of our self created isolation. Feelings are vital to our human experience.

     With all the benefits of emotions, why are we so afraid to feel them? We have been taught to hide our emotions. Men are encouraged to be strong and not to cry. Women are taught not to express their anger. Children are told to tone down all their emotional expressions. Teenagers are warned not to wear their heart on their sleeve. The elderly are criticized for being too emotional. People in emotional pain are comforted by the words, “Don’t cry; everything will be all right.” 

     In our society, we have been taught that emotions can be dangerous. People are embarrassed by the expression of feelings. For some, expressing emotion is a sign of weakness. Many of us believe that if we explore our emotions, we will be overwhelmed by the depth of these feelings. We are afraid our emotions will stimulate us to take an action we will regret. We have been taught that emotions are untrustworthy. Some people think that if they start to cry, they will never be able to stop.

     We have wrongly believed that if we suppressed our emotions, they would simply go away. We swallow our tears, bite our tongues, and eat our anger in an effort to ignore our feelings. Unfortunately, the energy of these emotions remains in our inner beings, gathering strength with every unexpressed feeling. If we keep pushing the feelings down, they build up, eventually exploding in an unexplained bout of rage or tears. 

     Repressed emotions negatively affect our health. The effect of stress on heart disease is common knowledge. To quote in medical terms more than 70% of the people who suffer from heart attacks are males. Reason: males are supposed to be strong and are not meant to cry. In other words they are not supposed to express their feelings.  Sometimes, it is as if our repressed emotions are symbolically expressed through disease in our bodies.
    
Many people resist their emotions because they fear the consequences of expressing their feelings. They do not want to hurt others or themselves by honestly speaking the truth. Crisis, with its emotional upheaval, brings an opportunity to learn to deal effectively with our feelings. During a crisis, everything is heightened, allowing one to experience, express, and transmute/display years of repressed emotions. When our emotional body is blocked with old feelings, it is difficult to know what we are currently feeling.

Hence feelings should be looked upon as a friend and not as a foe. Crisis should be looked upon as an opportunity that helps us to explore our emotions thereby getting better acquainted with one of the most intimate dimensions of our’s: “Our Feelings”.

(This is a Copyright Article published in various newspapers and magzines under the name of the blog writer)

Healthy Criticism: An Art

CRITICISM WITHOUT INVOKING THE HATRED OF OTHERS REQUIRES TO BE MADE WITH A LOT OF CARE & AT THE SAME TIME MUST BE EFFECTIVE. IT MUST SOLVE THE PURPOSE FOR WHICH IT IS INTENDED TO. VERY OFTEN WE COME ACROSS SITUATIONS WHEREIN THE NEED OF CHANGING OR MODIFYING THE ATTITUDE OF OUR FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS OR RELATIVES IS REQUIRED. IT IS A VERY DELICATE SITUATION TO TACKLE, ESPECIALLY WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE CLOSE TO US. 

IN SUCH SITUATIONS, BEFORE SAYING ANYTHING WE ARE APREHENSIVE THAT HOW IT WILL BE TAKEN?  WOULD IT BE TAKEN IN THE SAME SPIRIT AS WE MEAN IT TO BE OR WOULD IT BACKFIRE? MANY TIMES WE UNKNOWINGLY HURT THE FEELING OF OTHERS BY BEHAVING IN A MANNER THAT ACCORDING TO US IS RIGHT/JUSTIFIED WITHOUT BOTHERING TO FIND OUT WHETHER THE PERSON SITTING OPPOSITE US ALSO FEELS THE SAME WAY. A FEW MINUTES THOUGHT, A CONSIDERATE WORD OR TWO, AN UNDERSTANDING FROM THE OTHER PERSONS ANGLE & DISCUSSION WITH ELDERS WOULD HELP US NOT ONLY IN CHANGING HIM BUT ALSO COMING CLOSER & THAT TOO WITHOUT HURTING.

HOW TO BEGIN?

"WELL BEGUN IS HALF DONE".  MAKE A GOOD BEGINING & HALF OF THE BATTLE IS WON. SO BEGIN BY APPRECIATING ONE’S POSITIVE POINTS. IT MAY BE AS SIMPLE AS “YOU ALWAYS DRESS VERY WELL” OR THAT “YOU ALWAYS LOOK FRESH & ENERGETIC”. याहां कंजुसी मत करिये... DON’T MISS THIS OPPOURTUNITY. THIS WILL MAKE ONE READY TO LISTEN TO YOU. APPRECIATION & CRITICISM (तारीफ़ और ताना) MUST ALWAYS BE IN THE PROPORTATION OF 2:1 & THAT TOO APPRECIATION FIRST.

SELECT PROPER WORDS:

WE NEED TO BE VERY CAUTIOUS & CAREFUL ABOUT THE LANGUAGE IN WHICH WE COMMUNICATE. FOR OFTEN WHAT WE SPEAK IN A SPUR OF EXITEMENT MIGHT OFFEND THE LISTENER.

BE TRANSPERENT:

TRY TO DESCRIBE YOUR FEELINGS ABOUT OTHER’S BEHAVIOR IN THE WAY IT AFFECTS YOU. DON’T MAKE JUDGEMENT & NEGATIVE EVALUATION ABOUT OTHER'S.  IT WILL MAKE HIM DEFENSIVE & IN ATTACKING ATTITUDE TOWARDS YOU. HE WILL DELIBERATELY FIND & POINT OUT YOU LACUNA'S. ON THE CONTRARY THE MOMENT YOU SAY LET US SIT TOGETHER & DISCUSS, IMMEDIATELY, A FRIENDLY ATMOSPHERE GETS DEVELOPED. THIS, BECAUSE THE OTHER PERSON FEELS THAT YOU ARE INTERESTED IN LISTENING & UNDERSTANDING FROM HIS ANGLE & NOT JUST IN PASSING ANY JUDGEMENT.

LANGUAGE MATTERS:

AVOID WORDS LIKE बेवकुफ, ढीला, स्वार्थी, मतलबी, निकम्मा, जिन्दगी मे कुछ नही कर सकेगा, आज तक कुछ किया नही.. COMMENTS ON PERSONALITY LIKE मोटा, मरियल, बुटका, MUST BE STRICTLY AVOIDED. IF YOU LOOK AT YOURSELF YOU TOO MIGHT HAVE MANY NEGATIVE THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF OR YOUR PERSONALITY.  HELP OTHER PERSON TO UNDERSTAND YOUR VIEW POINT. LET HIM UNDERSTAND HOW HIS BEHAVIOUR HAS AFFECTED YOU. 

EXPRESS DIRECTLY:

THE EXACT INTENDED MESSAGE GETS TWISTED & MODIFIED IF SENT THROUGH OTHERS.  BY THE TIME YOUR MESSAGE REACHES TO WHOM IT IS INTENDED TO IT LOOSES ITS ORIGINALITY GETS TWISTED & THE OTHER PERSON MIGHT GET HURT. THIS WAY THE VERY PURPOSE OF THE MESSAGE GETS DEFEATED.

CRITICISE IN PRIVATE:

WHILE CRITICISING ALWAYS SPEAK IN PRIVATE. THE CRITICISM GETS DILUTED & THEREFORE THERE IS MORE CHANCE OF IT GETTING ACCEPTABLE. IF CRITICISED IN PUBLIC A FEELING OF BEING HUMILIATED & INSULTED GETS AROUSED.

PRAISE IN PUBLIC:

IF YOU APPRECIATE A PERSON IN GROUP, HE FEELS HONOURED. THEN IF REQUIRED YOU COULD EXPECT A POSITIVE RESPONSE FROM HIM ON ANY COMMENT OR CRITISISM. “A BITTER PILL AFTER A SWEET ONE IS EASIER TO BE ADVISED”.

ONE THING AT A TIME:

THIS UNIVERSAL CONCEPT APPLIES SUCCESSFULLY HERE ALSO. FOCUS ON ONE ISSUE AT A TIME THAN A LONG LIST. WHEN A PERSON IS BOMBARDED WITH TOO MANY UNPLEASENT ISSUES AT ONE GO NOTHING GETS REGISTERED. ONE FEELS THAT IF HE HAS SO MANY MINUS POINTS IT IS JUST IMPOSSIBLE TO RECTIFY THEM & THAT HE IS WORTHLESS. SO HE NEGLECTS ALL & STARTS AVOIDING YOU.

EXPRESS VERBALLY:

हाथ पांव पटकना, चिल्लाना, दरवाज़ा जोर से बंद करना, खाने की थाली छोड कर उठ जाना, बात चित बंद कर देना, रिस्पौन्स नही देना, COLD STAIRS, SHOUTING- NONE OF THESE WORK. NON-VERBAL MESSAGES CREATE CONFUSION. HOW CAN YOU EXPECT THE OTHER PERSON TO UNDERSTANDING WHAT IS IN YOUR MIND WHEN IS NOT ABLE TO UNDERSTAND WHERE HE HIMSELF HAS GONE WRONG? SO “SPEAK & COMMUNICATE WITH WORDS SPOKEN”.

DO NOT SOUND APOLOGETIC:

MOST OFTEN WE FEEL GUILTY WHEN WE CRITICISE OUR NEAR & DEAR ONES. THIS OFCOURSE COMES FROM OUR NATURAL LOVE & AFFECTION FOR THEM. BUT THEN WE NEED TO UNDERST& THAT FOR THE SAME LOVE & AFFECTION WE ARE CRITICISING THEM. THE PURPOSE IS TO HELP THEM REALISE & RECTIFY THEIR MISTAKES.  THEEFORE NEVER SOUND APOLOGETIC. EXPRESSIONS LIKE “PLEASE FORGIVE ME…. OR I AM SORRY TO SAY….” DIMINISHES THE IMPACT OF THE MESSAGE. REMEMBER APOLOGY IS GIVEN OR OFFERED WHEN YOU COMMIT SOME MISTAKE & NOT WHEN YOU ARE TRYING TO RECTIFY ONE.

DO NOT COMPARE:

I DO NOT AGREE WITH THE THINKING THAT COMPARISON LEADS TO A HEALTHY COMPETATION. INSTEAD IT LEADS TO RESENTMENT & COMPLETE REJECTION OF YOUR VIEWS EVEN IF THEY ARE CORRECT. COMPARISON OFFENDS & DELIVERS A BLOW TO ONE’S SELF-ESTEEM SOMETIMES IT LEADS TO A FEELING OF ANIMOSITY FOR THE PERSON WITH WHOM COMPARISON IS MADE. WHEN A PERSON IS REPEATEDLY TOLD THAT HE IS NOT GOOD OR THE OTHER PERSON IS BETTER THAN HIM HE WILL TEND TO DISMISS YOUR STANDARDS & YOUR WORDS WILL LOOSE THEIR VALUE.

DO NOT USE WORDS LIKE ALWAYS & NEVER:

SUCH WORDS DILUTE THE POWER OF YOUR STATEMENTS LEADING TO A TOTAL DISREGARD FOR YOUR IDEAS & OPINIONS. “ALWAYS” COMPLETELY DECRIES THE PAST. “NEVER” SEEMS TO SAY THAT HE IS GOING TO REMAIN AS HE IS FOREVER & THAT HE CAN NEVER IMPROVE SUCH WORDS WOULD GENERATE AN INSTANT NEGATIVE REACTION. THAT ONE IS ACTING WITH A PREJUDUSICED MIND.

DO NOT BE SARCASTIC:

BEING SARCASTIC FAILS TO CONVEY THE MESSAGE BUT HURTS THE FEELINGS. SARCASTIC MEANS EXPRESSING PRAISES LIKE COMMENTS. FOR EXAMPLE: TELLING WIFE THAT TODAY FOOD IS VERY EXECELLENT & THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN THE KITCHEN OF A FIVE STAR HOTEL OR YOUR BRAIN IS EXECELLENT & THAT IT CAN BE KEPT IN A MUSUEM. THE OTHER PERSON FEELS EMBARASSED, ASHAMED & DEVEALOPS A REVENGE TAKING ATTITUDE.

“CRITICISM IS AN ART THAT CAN BE LEARNED THROUGH ONE’S PERSONAL MISTAKES & EXPERIENCE, THROUGH DISCUSSIONS & MOST IMPORTANTLY AN EMPATHATIC ATTITUDE TOWARDS OTHERS”.

(This is a Copyright Article published in various newspapers and magzines under the name of the blog writer)

What was my blunder??

What was my Blunder……..

Time was when life was a dream
life seemed 2 b layered with butter & cream.

Dream was the only world I lived in
Life, in fact, I thought had just begin.

Present was 1 thing I was fully assured
Future appeared 2 be cent per cent insured

Little did I sensed that life, indeed, had just begun.

Dreams started giving way 2 reality
Fate, I realised was big n mighty.

Life was never a bed of roses, I knew,
Bed of roses it is for far n few.

Realisation dawned n I begin 2 wonder
Among all this what was my blunder....

Regards,
Amit Heda.

This poem was written by the blog writer. Location: Orange City Hospital, Waiting Hall.
Time: Midnight..

CRISIS~ TEST OF FAITH AND PATIENCE??

It has happened to every one of us — whether it is an untimely death in the family, a beloved suffering from a fatal illness, marital problem or a financial setback - we have all had to face a crisis at some time or another in our lives. Often, we are quick to give advice to others on how to deal with the trials and tribulations of life, but the real test of whether we have truly understood the teachings comes when we ourselves face a major challenge.

Crisis is an uninvited guest that is neither welcomed nor can be kicked out of our lives easily. In short it is very frightening, painful and troublesome.  Its mere mention brings feelings of remorse, sadness, fear, and regret.  Is there anybody who wants to face death, financial ruin, loss of a job, or a divorce? Certainly NO! What more, we even do not wish these events on others; friends or foes.

Crisis leads towards the destruction of life and being a double edged sword completely destabilizes our life. It shakes our self belief, moral, perception & confidence and the manner in which we react to situations. However as there are two sides of every coin; there indeed is a silver lining; crisis showers upon us its blessings although in disguised form. We begin to value and appreciate what we already possess much more; something that we conveniently ignored before. Sometimes people in crisis will find an inner strength they never knew existed. We tend to develop a greater and deeper bond with God and our karmas, thus unconsciously…or consciously believing that there is someone divine looking after and watching us – guiding us. It sows in us the seeds of empathy. In short it makes us more HUMAN!

We all understand we cannot avoid the consequences of our deeds (karmas). We also know that suffering is the effect of our own karmas, which must be undergone …. to get closer to God, to become learned spiritually. Yet, when we experience some form of suffering, many of us forget what the spiritual path has taught us and we allow ourselves to be tricked by the mind, and thus, fall into the trap of thinking that the Lord has deserted us and is making us experience the worst of life. How can we help ourselves in such situations? Would the Lord really ever abandon us? How can we make ourselves strong to withstand pain and accept whatever happens as the will of the Lord? I remember hearing Amitabh bachchan often referring to his legendry father Dr Hariwansh Rai Bachchan’s quote “अपने मन का हो तो अच्छा, ना हो तो और भी अच्छा. क्योंकि वो ईश्वर के मन का होता है और ईश्वर कभी बुरा नही करता!! (If things turn up as per your wish: Good. If it doesn’t; Even Better. Because then it happens according to the wish of god and god never harms us).

"We are companions..."

First and foremost, we need to believe that the Lord is always with his disciple. In the most painful moments of life, he offers every disciple the grace of inner strength. If we truly look to him for support, then we become receptive to this grace. We can remind ourselves of the famous poem, Footprints, in which the Lord lovingly says: "My precious child, I never left you during your times of trial and suffering. When you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I was carrying you." At every moment, he is taking care of us. He will not change our destiny and neither should we ask him to, but he will be there to give us all the support and strength we need. When a child is suffering, it is the mother who feels the pain and who will do everything to relieve her child's misery. If so much love can be given by our worldly parents, just imagine how much stronger our Lord's love for us is and how much more he cares for us.

The Lords have said that our pain is also their pain, and that they are happy when we are happy, and sad when we are sad. In life, we are given so many hidden messages that we are not alone and the Lord is always there for us — we just need to believe it.

It’s just a matter of time….

Hardships and heartache will always be there. Lord has never promised us a pain-free life. But he has promised that the clouds of darkness will one day pass to allow the sun to shine again. We need to think positively at all times. Positive thoughts are not built on vague hopes, but on deep faith in the Lord's embracing and protective hand. If things do not go the way we expect them to, then we must learn to accept it. By adopting a positive attitude, we will gradually learn to face each day with hope and courage.

Things could have been worse…..

When faced with adversity, we walk around with a heavy heart, dwelling on our problems. We look as if the whole world is falling apart on us. We forget that we could have been spared from something much worse. We need to understand that the one who gives us happiness and pain knows what is best for us. The Lords continually remind us that adversity is another form of grace because it pushes the disciple closer to his Lord. In short: “Adversity is a blessing in disguise”.

Have faith and belief….Surrender and accept

It may feel at times that the Lord expects a great deal from us but he never gives us more than we can handle. He comforts us so that we endure with faith. Thus, when we are troubled, we must remember that life is filled with both light and darkness. Storms will come, but a disciple should never be afraid. Everything is pre ordained in this world. We cannot escape a misfortune or a crisis, nor can a good fortune escape us. So there is no point or sense for lamenting or rejoicing for either. Our destiny cannot be changed, so it is our choice to either moan or accept things with a positive attitude. The way we handle the situation is up to us. If we believe that the Lord is aware of everything that we are going through, then why not let things happen the way he wants them to. There is a reason for everything. By keeping our attention on the Lord, we will realise that we are not facing anything alone; that there is a guiding hand behind each one of us, giving the support and strength to face the pain gracefully. It is, therefore, our duty to do our best to live life courageously, surrender and accept, and allow life's challenges to serve their purpose - to pull us closer to him.

The blog writer is a management professional and operates a Manpower & Property Consultancy Firm. Besides, he is President of "Consumer Justice Council", Secretary of "SARATHI", Member of "Jan Manch", Non Official member of "Weights & Measurements Department", Nagpur, Holds "Palakatva of NMC" in Shivaji Nagar area and Is a Para Legal Volunteer, District Court Nagpur.

(This is a Copyright Article published in various newspapers and magzines under the name of the blog writer)

Sai Baba Poem

Consumer: No Longer a Slave!

 "The consumer or the customer is the most important visitor on our premises. He is not dependent on us. We are dependent on him. He is not an interruption on our work. He is the purpose of it. He is not an outsider on our business. He is part of it. We are not doing him a favour by serving him. He is doing us a favour by giving us an opportunity to do so."
- MAHATMA GANDHI

Who is a Consumer?

Any individual who purchases products or services for his personal use and not for manufacturing or resale is called a “Consumer”. Consumer refers to any person who purchases some goods for a consideration that has been either paid or promised to pay or partly paid and partly promised, or found under any system of deferred payment and does not include a person who gets such goods for resale or for any business purpose. A person who has not himself purchased the goods but who uses the goods with the approval of the buyer is also a consumer. The moment we take birth on this earth we become consumers and are entitled to seek relief and be duly protected. The growing size and complexity of production and distribution systems, the high level of sophistication in marketing and selling practices and forms of promotion like advertising, etc. have contributed to the increased need for consumer protection. The Consumer Protection Act, 1986  with subsequent amendments is the most important legislation enacted to provide for effective safeguards to consumers against various types of exploitations and unfair dealings. The Consumer Protection Act, 1986, is definitely a blessing for consumers wronged by manufacturers or dealers.

      “Consumer is the King”

An average Indian consumer is noted for his patience and tolerance. Perhaps because of these two traditional traits and due to the influence of the Mahabharata, the Ramayana and the Bhagavad Gita, he considers the receipt of defective goods and services as an act of fate or unfavorable planetary position in his horoscope. When a new television or refrigerator purchased by him turns out to be defective from day one, he takes it reticently, blaming it on his fate or as the consequence of the wrongs committed by him in his previous birth. Very often he is exploited, put to avoidable inconveniences and suffers financial loss. However with the emergence of consumer laws and subsequent awareness among the consumers regarding their rights, responsibilities and their powers consumers today are no longer easy preys to the whims and fancy of trader’s manufacturers and service providers and are certainly not at their mercy. In the business world it is often said that ‘Consumer/Customer is the king’. And in a way it is true for the trade. If the product is not sold there is a loss. That is why customer rules the market. Consumers are the most important part of every economy for zero demand would lead the economy to collapse. We buy a variety of goods and services in our day to day life and derive satisfaction from its consumption and use. Thus we all are consumers, and as a consumer, we expect a certain value for money, that is, right quality, right quantity, right prices, information about the product, etc. Nowadays, cheating on consumers has become a common practice followed by greedy manufacturers and sellers by the way of black marketing, overcharging, misleading ads, etc. There are many ways by which consumers are exploited. A few of them are:

A. Selling at higher prices -- The price charged for the product will not be proportionate to the quality;

B. Product risk -- Drugs that are hazardous, banned or beyond expiry date, electrical appliances with inadequate safety precautions, etc;

C. Adulteration -- This is very common in food items and could prove to be highly injurious to one's health;

D. Sub-standard Products -- Items whose quality is far below the required standard;

E. False Claims -- Manufacturers make false representations about their products in the media with a view to mislead the consumers. Claiming that use of a particular oil will cure baldness, using a company's fairness cream for a specific period will make one fair, etc., are all typical examples of exaggerated, misleading advertisements; and

F. Warranty/Annual Maintenance Contract -- In many cases, though the product will have a warranty or will be under annual maintenance contract (AMC), when a problem arises, the consumer is told that certain parts will not be covered and they will have to pay.

These circumstances make it all the more important for the government to make the consumers aware of their rights. Let us know these rights of the consumers:

Right to Safety

Means right to be protected against the marketing of goods and services, which are hazardous to life and property. The purchased goods and services availed of should not only meet their immediate needs, but also fulfill long term interests. To simplify this it can be said that it is the duty of the manufacturers and the distributor not to supply any goods to the consumers which fails to comply with the general safety requirements in all circumstances.

Right to be Informed

Means right to be informed about the quality, quantity, potency, purity, standard and price of goods so as to protect the consumer against unfair trade practices.

Right to Choose

Means right to be assured, wherever possible of access to variety of goods and services at competitive price. In case of monopolies, it means right to be assured of satisfactory quality and service at a fair price.

Right to be Heard

Means that consumer's interests will receive due consideration at appropriate forums. It also includes right to be represented in various forums formed to consider the consumer's welfare. Right to be heard is not only the foremost right of consumers it is a principle of natural justice also.

Right to Seek Redressal

Means right to seek redressal against unfair trade practices or unscrupulous exploitation of consumers. It also includes right to fair settlement of the genuine grievances of the consumer..

Right to Consumer Education

Means the right to acquire the knowledge and skill to be an informed consumer throughout life. Ignorance of consumers, particularly of rural consumers, is mainly responsible for their exploitation. They should know their rights and must exercise them. Only then real consumer protection can be achieved with success. This right is most important right because once the people are rendered conscious of their power, they may perhaps, feel energized to struggle against exploitation by manufacturers and traders. However, consumer’s strongest and the most precious right, which he keeps to the last, is the ‘refusal to buy’ and withdraw the patronage from the seller who always craves for it because, without it, he has none to sell.

Consumer Court/Forum:

With an aim to deal with cases pertaining to consumer grievances and disputes, the consumer courts or consumer forums also known as special purpose courts were established in India. Set up by the government, these courts aim to protect the rights of consumers. Consumers are free to file a case against the seller if they have been exploited or harassed. On having proof of exploitation (bills or supporting documents) the court will give verdict in favor of the consumers. However failure on part of the consumer to produce proper documents will make it difficult for him to file or win the case.

Who can file a consumer complaint?

The Consumer Protection Act itself provides a list of persons who can file a complaint under the Act which is described hereunder-

Firstly a Consumer

Secondly, Any voluntary Association Registered under the Companies Act, 1956, or under any other law for the time being in force

Thirdly the Central government or the State Government

Fourthly one or more consumers, where there are numerous Consumers having the same interest.
 
Besides the above the following can also file a Consumer Complaint:

Any person who is a beneficiary of the goods/services

Legal representatives of deceased consumers

Legal heirs of the deceased consumer

Husband/Wife of the consumer

Relative of the consumer

Can a Consumer himself file a Complaint?

YES. He doesn’t need to engage the services of any Advocate and can file complaint of his own. The consumer protection act has provided a very simple procedure to file the complaint that even a layman who is not from the law background, can file the complaint of its own.

HOW TO FILE A CONSUMER COMPLIANT?

 Before formally filing a Consumer Complaint, it is desired that the Consumer gives notice to the opposite party of the fact of any deficiency in service or of unfair trade practice etc to see if the trader is willing to make good the loss suffered by either replacing the commodity or returning the value of the purchase. If yes, the issue resolves then and there. But if the trader refuses or neglects here that the consumers needs to approach the Consumer Court.

The Consumer would have to check where the jurisdiction would lie and then ascertain the value of the claim. He will have to file the complaint depending upon the amount of money or compensation he wants from the opposite party for the deficient service he has provided or for the defective product that he has been sold. 

STEP 1:        At first identify the Jurisdiction of the Forum where the complaint is to be filed. This issue needs to be identified from two angles of jurisdiction i.e. Territorial and Pecuniary.

Territorial Jurisdiction of the Consumer Forums:-
 
A complaint shall be instituted in a District Forum or State Commission or National within the local limits of whose jurisdiction,—
a)    The opposite party resides or caries on business or has a branch office or personally works for gain, or

b)      If there are more than one opposite party, then any one of the opposite parties resides, or carries on business or has a branch office, or personally works for gain,

c)    The cause of action arose.

Pecuniary Jurisdictions of Consumer Forum

1) District Forum: Upto 20 Lakhs
2) State Commission: 20 lakh to 1 Crs
3) National Commission: Above 1 Crs

Step 2:    He will be required to pay a prescribed fee along with his complaint before the District Forum, State Commission & the National Commission as the case may be.

Step 3:    Then he has to draft the complaint stating facts necessary to establish a cause of action.

Step 4:    At the end of the complaint he has to put his signatures. In case any other person is authorized to file the complaint then complaint has to be accompanied with authorization letter.

Step 5:     Don’t forget to mention the name, description and address of the complainant and the name, description, address of the opposite party or parties against whom relief is claimed.

Step 6:    Copies of all the documents supporting your allegations. In this consumer can put on record the copy of the bill of the goods bought, warranty and guarantee documents and also a copy of the written complaint and notice made to the trader requesting him to rectify the product.

Step 7:    The consumer can also ask for compensation costs which should be specifically alleged in the complaint. Besides compensation, a consumer can also ask for the refunds, damages, litigation costs, and interest amount. He must give the breakup of amount claimed under different heads but do remember to claim compensation or other relief as per the pecuniary value of the forums.

Step 8:   The consumer is required to explain in his complaint as to how the case falls within the jurisdiction of this forum.

Step 9:    Complaint must clearly state as to what relief is sought against the opposite party.

Step 10: The consumer is also required to file an affidavit along with the complaint that facts stated in the complaint are true and correct.

Step 11: The complainant can present the complaint in person or by his/her authorized representative without engaging any advocate. The complaint can be sent by registered post. A minimum of 5 copies of the complaint is to be filed in the forum. Besides this the consumer has to file additional copies for each opposite party.

If a consumer is not satisfied by the decision of a District Forum, he can appeal to the State Commission. Against the order of the State Commission a consumer can come to the National Commission.

 Is There Any Time Limit For Filing A Complaint?

A) Yes, the time limit is within two years from the date on which the cause of action arises. This would mean two years from the day the deficiency in service or defect in goods has arisen/detected.

Can This Time Limit Ever Be Extended?

A) Yes, But only under certain Circumstances. If the time limit expires but you are still able to satisfy the Forum or Commission about the reasonableness in the delay, your complaint can still be taken up. However, the delay for every single day has to be explained.

National Consumer Helpline

NCH is a project of the Union Ministry of Consumer Affairs. The Project recognizes the need of consumers for a Telephone Helpline to deal with multitude of problems arising in their day-to-day dealings with business and service providers. NCH provides a National Toll Free No-1800-11-4000. SMS can also be sent to 918130009809 mentioning the name and city.

National Consumer Helpline Supports Consumer by:

-Guiding consumers in finding solutions to problems related with Products & Services

- Providing information regarding to Companies & Regulatory Authorities.

- Facilitating consumers in filing complaints against defaulting Service Providers

- Empowering consumers to use available Consumer Grievances Redressal  Mechanisms, Educating Consumers about their Rights and Responsibilities.

Besides this, there are bodies like Consumer Justice Councils and other consumer NGO’s that too guide the consumers and help them to fight for their cause. Thus, much has been done for the protection of the consumer. Of Course much more needs to be done as it’s like a never ending process and would require continuous monitoring. At the same time it is the duty of the consumer to be conscious of his rights especially when he buys something. However what is most important is that the Consumer’s needs to be an enlightened consumer. An enlightened consumer is an empowered consumer. An aware consumer not only protects himself from exploitation but induces efficiency, transparency and accountability in the entire manufacturing and services sector. This, in turn leads to the overall development and growth of the economy.

(The blog writer is President: Consumer Justice Council, Maharashtra. This Article is published in various newspapers and magzines under the name of the blog writer)

Open letter to Aamir Khan dated 17/7/2012

Mr Aamir Khan.

Trust you are doing well. I am Amit Heda from Nagpur. As millions worldwide I am also an ardent follower of your work not only for movies but for other aspects of your multifaceted personality as well. Very few individuals could have generated the kind of curiosity and also authenticity as you have through "Satyamev Jayate". Needless to say your reputation and goodwill virtually forces the people to believe in what you try to put across and in turn try to make the necessary corrections/changes in their mindset and also in the system. Thanks for what you have done and also for what you intend to in the time to come. Aamir, you rightly tried to present the plight and sufferings of the females in one of your episodes. Appreciate the same. Having said that may I take the liberty of drawing your attentions towards something very significant and crucial that you need to work on and if appears to be appropriate to highlight in one of your shows?     
             
            Divorce is a stigma not only for those who unfortunately go through it but also for their near and dear ones and for the society as well. And it should be rightly avoided as far as possible. Sir, it has been seen that majority of the family laws are in favor of females. This might have been done mostly keeping the sufferings and plight of women’s mostly from the rural setup where there is lack of literacy and courage and with the intention of empowering them and helping them in securing their rights. However what one comes across many a time is that this family law is used by educated and literate females and their family members as an arm twisting tactics and there are thousands of cases where the husbands and their families are at the receiving end for no/little fault of theirs. This needs to be looked into and necessary changes need to be incorporated so that the law does not act biasely. For your reference kindly visit www.498.org. It is a site dedicated to fight against dowry law (IPC 498a) misuse by Indian women. This website is an attempt to create awareness among Indian nationals about the rampant misuse of 498a (Dowry Law misuse) by unscrupulous women to extort money and harass their husband's entire extended family. This website is dedicated to the victims of gender-biased laws of India (498a and domestic violence against women law) and provides comprehensive and free information about how to protect yourself and take preventive measures to save your family from this law which has been termed as 'legal terrorism' by Honorable Supreme Court of India. This website also attempts to explain the future disastrous results of badly formulated and gender biased "Domestic violence against women law" which grossly violates the liberty and dignity of an average man and his extended family members. Anyone who is educated and reads the guidelines of the law can see how vicious this law is and what it's social implications are and will be. Also kindly visit www.crisp-india.org. This would help you understand my concern.

I hope, aamir, that as a genuine crusader of all the wrongdoings and evil system prevailing in our society and more importantly as a rationally thinking individual you would not only look into the matter but would also highlight the same.

Regards,
Amit Heda.
heda.amit@gmail.com.

(This is a Copyright Article registered in the name of the Blog Writer).

Pl note that i am myself father of a girl child. Hence i hv no biased intentions.

Gabbar Singh of SHOLAY: A Management Guru..

Gabbar Singh was a MANAGEMENT GURU as is reflected in some of the timeless management lessons he delivered thru the movie Sholay.

1. Jo Darr Gaya - Samjho Mar Gaya!
Courage and enterprise are important factors for laying the successful foundation of a growth oriented business.

2. Kitne Admi The..??
It's important to know the competition and its size. He understood that even a small team can make a difference.

3. Arey O Sambha, Kitna Inaam Rakhe Hai Sarkar Hum Par?
Know your market value. Promoting one's own brand is very important and to be reiterated always.

4.  Goli 6 Aur Aadmi 3!
Create an illusion where his insurbodinates had a chance of survival but kills them in the next scene.
Moral - Perform or perish.

5. Le Ab Goli Kha
Sometimes in the interest of the organisation you have to take hard and unpopular decisions....
So sometimes a leader has to 'fire' some employees.

6. Yeh Ramgarh Waale Apni Betiyon Ko Kaunsi Chakki Ka Aata Khilate Hai Re.
Market research is important to understand value propositions !!

7. Yeh Haath Mujhey Dedey Thakur.
Identify elements of threats in the market and take measures to minimise them.

8. Holi Kab Hai, Kab Hai Holi ?
Conduct advance mapping of key events within the industry and devise penetration strategy to have a competitive edge over your rivals.

Divorce Steps: India

The marriage performed in India as
per any caste customs, is recognized as
a valid marriage. If the couple
agreeing for mutual consent divorce, it
may take a minimum period of six
months. Any of the spouse is absent
during summons, an alternate service
of summons will be done so that the
case can be decided exparte, within
three to four months. Alimony is not
granted by court in mutual divorce
and mutual consent is not
challengeable. But duration in case of
a Contested Divorce ranges between 2
to 4 years. The divorce procedures in
India are tremendously challenging
both emotionally and financially.
The judicial system has a vested
interest in protecting the institution of
marriage. For this exact reason, Indian family courts demand reasons like cruelty (Physical & Mental), Desertion (Period
varies from 2 to 3 years), Unsoundness
of mind, Impotency, Adultery etc. for
Grounds of Divorce which can be
uniquely called ‘Matrimonial
Offences'. The divorce process
formally starts when a spouse files a
petition for divorce via a lawyer and a
divorce notice is sent out to the other
party. In Contested Divorce Petition,
the courts typically would send the
couple to counseling or a mediation
service and impose a waiting period.
This might lead to re-unification or an
amicable split/divorce. Divorce case
can be filed where marriage has taken
place, where they started living soon
after the marriage and prior to
separation where the respondent was
residing etc. Wife can also file a case
from the place where she is living
after leaving the matrimonial home.
The main issue in a contested divorce
is custody of children. There is no
fixed formula as to who would be
entitled to have the custody of
children. In deciding issue of custody
of children, the most important factor
is the welfare of the children which is
the paramount consideration in
deciding this issue.
Note: Divorce is a stigma for all those involved. So far as possible it should be avoided. But if unavoidable best way is to settle it amicably.